Breaking Bad Habits With A Plan
How can we create an easy to do plan to break our bad habit? This, and the10 key tips that we can use to break ourselves of bad habits once and for all — is what we are going over today.
So let’s jump right.
Be aware
Step zero of changing a bad habit is awareness. If you don’t even notice what bad habit cycle you are caught in, you wont change it.
Uplevel your awareness, by getting curious about your bad habit. Don’t change anything yet but take some notes.
What are you doing right before the action of the habit?
What do you actually want to change?
How do you feel afterward?
Understand your habit brain
There are 2 parts to your brain … Habit brain and Reasoning brain. Your reasoning brain has all the new thoughts and creative ideas and is the part of your brain that will map out the plan that we are talking about here.
Your habit brain is a workhorse.
Your habit brain is always on the lookout for the easiest way to do something to get to the “reward” (the urge your brain is looking to fulfill) … so when you are triggered to do something, and you do it, your habit brain kicks in to remember everything you did before so that it can urge you to do it again.
Knowing your brain process — trigger, urge, easiest way to fill the urge, habit — take the emotion of shame, and guilt out of why our habits were started.
Create a plan
Step one to breaking our bad habits would be to create a plan. There is no way we are going to get anywhere without even a loose plan. A plan is a thought out intention so — What we need to do is think outside the cycle of habit and make a plan.
It doesn’t need to be complicated — but with intention.
The way that we start to make our plan for how we are going to change a habit is by getting into the heart of why.
➡️ Why are we doing this habit? What’s triggering you? (look at your notes from before #step zero)
➡️ What need is it filling? The thing that we’re doing that we want to change, is it supplementing something? Is it covering up a feeling? i.e. instead of wanting to feel like a failure you binge eat to feel good.
➡️ Is it to take care of something? i.e. nail biting
➡️ Is it because we’re feeling a certain way?
It may be the hardest step, but it’s almost like taking off the feelings of shame, and regret and putting on a lab coat and getting curious about why this habit is here. How did it get started, might be a GREAT clue for you on WHY it’s there.
I used to say that if you’re not able to make the change then your Why isn’t big enough or “good” enough. I tossed that process all into the garbage now. I believe that our thoughts produce our feelings and our feelings produce our actions. More like a self coaching model now.
But it works and it’s easy! It’s digging into you and your heart NOT another to-do list and color coded calendar to keep you on track of your good habits that you planned for to replace your “bad” habits.
There is a reason your bad habits started. What was it? How did you feel right before you started your habit? And what thought made you feel that way?
That thought — that’s the gold information you are mining your memories, heart and habits for!
Execute your plan
Step two is to execute your plan. A huge piece of execution is to keep your focus on what the heck you are trying to improve in your life and the other piece is to create a realistic expectation of how this is all going to happen.
If there is a way that you know will work for you to keep this thing you are doing in your life in focus — it will remind you to take the necessary action.
We are forgetful people and after a couple weeks of slow change we will lose interest, something else more dramatic in life will happen and we will start to forget about changing our habits … which is changing our life.
Once we forget we will slip back into old patterns that our habit brain does and very quickly we will be back at square one with more shame and self loathing because we can never “execute our plan”.
Set reminders in your phone or sticky notes on your mirror, or a vision board in front of your closet — whatever will keep this change top of mind — focus!
Also remembering that, according to the experts — it will take about 21 days to create or change a bad habit. Ha! More like 90days to 3 years. That might be more realistic. Think about creating a long term plan that is realistic so that you don’t feel “behind” … you are undoing years and years of habits … so don’t think you should be done already.
Take your time.
Progress over perfect.
Here are 10 key points that we can use to take away bad habits and replace them with good habits in our life.
1 | Mental gear up
The first one is to do a mental gear up and what I mean by mental gear up is that we need to remember that we are. For the long haul, we know why we’re going to take that white and we’re just going to run with it because to change a habit.
Experts suggested it takes 21 days. Some even would say even more 30 days or even 60 truths, your bad habit with your good one.
So knowing that it takes this long to change a habit, you can have this mental gear up that you are in this for a long haul to know that you’re not going to see results right away, but with time and consistency, you’re going to see results as you move forward in your Habit.
2 | Change your routine
Key point number two is to change your routine. What I mean by changing your routine is that it’s the little things that we can control, especially in our routine that we can use that we can change our bad habits into good ones.
So for example, if after the supper rush and everybody is up the door plane, or on the house plane, I can. I will make myself a cup of decaf, tea, coffee, or tea.
And with my decaf coffee or tea, I will have a cookie or maybe two cookies. And this is not a good habit to be in every single day.
So if I need to change my habit, then what it’s going to look like for me to change my routine is to stop having decaf coffee. After the stepper crazies, because that is what kicks my brain into gear is that it’s cookie time.
So change a little bit of your routine to break your bad habit.
3 | Research your habit and find solutions
Key point number three is to research your habit and find solutions. Isn’t it true that the more we put in, the more we will get out and I don’t mean effort and I don’t mean bad habits. I mean, if you are listening to, or watching or reading.
Information that is encouraging and helpful and motivating about this good habit that you’re trying to implement. It will be all the more motivation for you to break yourself out of the bad habit, because you’ve now have all this information and knowledge behind it.
4 | Have an accountability partner
Key point number four. Is to have an accountability partner all the time.
We can hear this and this can be so hard as to ask somebody for help. But if you’re trying to break a bad habit, maybe a great place to go to is someone, you know, and trust. And it could be like your partner would be a great a Person to hold you accountable.
I know mine is great for making sure that I get to bed on time because I will stay up and keep watching Netflix.
If we do not have accountability in this area, just a little bit like, oh my goodness.
5 | Spend your money elsewhere
Key point number five is to spend your money on something else because yes, yes, yes. Our habits cost us money and. It’s a good thing. Spend some money on a good habit that you want to and love to do, but if it’s a bad habit that you were trying to break, then a good way to help change that up.
And to break that habit was B would be to cut off that cash flow. Is to go to bed possibly a little bit earlier, or try to get more sleep or even just prioritize your sleep, make sure you’re getting enough sleep when we are in a season of change. And we’re trying to change our habits to break a bad habit and to have the willpower to stick it up the whole day.
It’s going to be hard in the sense that if you’re exhausted, willpower is too. Gone. It’s just, it’s so hard. I mean, for myself and my example, the decaf coffee and the cookie earlier to be exhausted, I will go for that decaf coffee. And if I go for the decaf coffee after supper, I know I will have a cookie or soup with it.
Wow. Because I am exhausted. I am trying to get a little bit of a pick me up and a little bit of a rest. Because I usually sit down with my cup of decaf coffee. So if I get enough sleep, I can have the willpower to grab a cup of water instead, and sit down with just a book and some water just for 10 minutes to give myself that after separate break that I need
7 | Eat food that is good for you
key point number seven is sweet and simple, but it’s to eat food that is good for you.
There is nothing like feeling gross and your body is sluggish because you’ve just eaten, not good food for you for lunch or you’ve skipped lunch altogether. There’s nothing that will wreck your bad habits more than. Not being able to focus on something or to have the willpower on something it’s almost like sleeping.
And the food goes hand in hand. I know that we know this and they’re like simple, simple tips, but keep trying to do it even if you didn’t quite get it for breakfast, try again for lunch, just eat a little bit. Just like a little bit, unless you’re already doing that, then good for you.
8 | Get professional help
Key point number eight in order to break a bad habit is get professional help. Sometimes we do need professional help, and that is not a bad thing. That is you being strong because you know where you are at your weakest and you know that you need help to break a bad habit.
You need to have somebody walk through it with you. Side-by-side in the form of professional help. Don’t be afraid to take the money you’re spending on your bad habit.
Use it to spend the money on professional help so that you can create a good habit. That is good for you.
9 | Take one step at a time
Key point number nine is to take it one step at a time. Or just to sound a little less cliche is to have patience with yourself. It will take time if you get a small one today or a small one, even this week or this month, or this year, that is a win for you.
That is a good thing. Keep going. Don’t get it. Just because you slipped right back into a bad habit of yours.
10 | Pray
The last and final key point is to pray about it. I know that when I feel like my self control is flagging, my willpower is in the trash can, there is nothing like a good dose of dear Lord, help me right now that will help me get back on track and help me remember my why and help me make sure that I keep going in my goodness.
And I am talking about myself here too, is to change a habit from a bad habit and replace it with something that is good for you. I know for myself it is something that I’m very aware of and I feel like it’s this lifelong struggle or something like that.
But if I take the time and I look back through my journey, Which could be another key point is to journal about it, to see how far you’ve come, but I can see how far I’ve come.
I can be very grateful for how far I’ve come, because I can look back. I can see the woman I was 10 years ago and know that might have.
My awareness and my trying to educate myself and learn about habits and break my bad ones and replace them with my good ones. It’s not all for nothing just because I don’t get it.
Perfect. Perfect. Doesn’t exist. But progress is for the best. Keep pressing on busy mom. You totally got this. If you need a little help to organize your week, to see where you can have some time to figure out a plan, possibly to research something good. To replace one of your not so good habits right now.
